so, how will you know if someone is trying to cheer you up if the things that they say to do so, is just going to mean negotiate to you? should they say something on how you can improve on or like say where something you did not do right and how you can make it right. because every time i ask my dad about something like that is negotiate, he always says to me 'did you ask God'? i know that it sounds like it won't help, but every time i get into a state where you are wanting to be in, i don't fuel it up, i stomp it down. I give it to the lord, and he gives me rest. and when i say wanting to be in that state, i mean it. people who do not want it in their lives don't talk about how it is draining them down, they find a to get out of their lives. young people who are dying today are commenting suicide because of the disease people are believing in their heads. you feeding the thing that is making you fail and feel bad about yourself, is what doing to make you not have the desire to live and feel wanted, it is killing you.
from what i can see from the forms, you have a very free spirit. you can do anything that you put your mind to. it does not matter the things that you have failed in the past because it is past, it is gone, you can not longer change it. the only things that you can do about it, is how you can do better in the future. there will always be times when you fail, always a time when you will fall, but that does not mean you can't do anything to make sure you won't do that again. there is a time when i am sinning a lot and i was getting aNxIeTy about it. i told my dad and he said 'i have been doing it a lot more times then you have. don't you think i am suppose to feel in a worse stat then you? but you don't see me getting anxiety about it. because i do the one thing that always helps... forgiveness in others and in yourself.'
sure it looks easy just forgiving and moving on only to repeat the thing you were sorry about, but that is the point of when people stumble. Are you doing to stay down and let that parasite suck all the good things out of your life? never, you get back up. you may fall ,but that is the point of growing up. find what it is that is making you fall and see what it is that you can do to do better. it knocks you down, you get back up. it knocks you down again, you get back up again. the only time when you are defeated, is the time when you have taken a fall and have given it the final saying.
i was trying to drive a manual truck today, and i almost crashed it more then 4 times, made the car turn off by itself because i was not using the clutch of the car properly (it is what makes the car move forward and change gear. when not used right, it turns off and holds up traffic and you have to reset the whole car and turn it on again well trying to keep the traffic going, but there are a lot of people trying to get somewhere and you holding them up will get them upset and adds even more pressure when you are driving with someone who has to teach you, but they are in the hands of someone who is not good at driving and hoping that they will see another day without getting crashed and/or getting killed) well, it is really hard trying to do that when you drive up hill, because the road is like making the engine work harder and you have to change gears really quickly or it will turn off and you end up going down the hill backwards) well, i did that more then 20 times on the road, my dad had more then 3 heart attacks of getting crashed and he could have told me to stop the car and get out and take us home and i was getting anxiety about it, but he remained calm. every time i was making a mistake on the road, i wanted to pull over and tell my dad if he can just take us home because i was just making more then 200 mistakes in less the 20min, but i didn't. He would just tell me 'learn from it, you will get better, keep on learning, you can do this, just keep on going.' i keep on feeling bad that i keep on making mistakes, but that was not going to keep me from driving a manual. i drove for more then 2 hour and i keep on making mistakes, but i was doing a whole lot better then when i started. i was stuck trying to drive up a hill and i make the car turn off more then 10 times in under a 1 min. i got told just to calm down, control yourself and feel the car. you can do it, just learn from it. i make the car jet forward, that is a sign of lacking control cause i could have crashed into my family's house, i still have a long way to go before i can drive a car that is a manual without giving my dad a heart attack, but i am looking forward for the day i can.
it does not matter if you don't get it in the first round, the only thing that matters is that are you going to get it right in the next one. even if you fail that time, you keep on going till you get it right. there is a quote i like 'take risks: if you win, you will be happy. if you fail, you will be wiser'. i may have typed out a lot, but seeing someone who is letting joy get sucked out and making the person a empty shell, is not what i want to see around here or anywhere i am at. i want to help out a whole lot more then just making a post, but the best thing i can do is just say what it is that i am doing about the situation you are going through and how i am handling it. you don't let weeds grow in your life, you up root them out, even if it is a small one or a big one. if it won't help you in life and make you feel more enclosed of who you are, bring out a flamethrower and burn it to the ground. (but logical wise tell your family about your situation and give it to God. and doing this can only be done if you believe. when that is done, you move on in life, you believe that anxiety is not in your life anymore and you declare to it who you are in Jesus name.)
'you are fearfully and wonderfully made' 'you are burn with purpose' 'God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of love and power and a sound mind' 'for we know that God works for the good of those who love him. who have been called according to his purpose' 'trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. in all your was acknowledge him and he will make your path straight'. Seek more for him, and he will draw nearer to you. 'read your bible everyday in the morning, believe on what the God has said, because it is a whole lot better then how you are handling it right now. seek him, but listen to him with your heart. How will you know, you will know in time as you have a desire to find him, and he will guide you towards what your heart desires. anything that is not of God is a enemy of God. i know i said a lot, but i don't want to see how the enemy is destroying your life, i want to see how you are going to do to make your life better in Jesus name for he is for you, not against you. seek in how you are going to do well in life. if all we think about is the negative things in life, that is what will make people loss their identity of who they are and are walking around without a purpose and are going to die believing that they are nothing, when they were made to do some extraordinary.