If you made me feel terrible about it, I forgive it, but I probably felt no worse about it than usual.
It would have been nice if I had opened with "I'm an ace" when discussing this subject. I underestimated the power of my sexual orientation to mold how I view the homosexual debate itself and how I respond to information about it.
The problem is, the asexual orientation isn't against Scripture as far as I know - you could even use 1 Corinthians 7 to defend it if you were so inclined, so my brain can't declare it a sin and get rid of it, much as I would like it gone. I get irritated when people use my orientation as an excuse to defend homosexuality, because ace and homosexuality are not the same thing in the eyes of God. Not even close.
On the other hand, I defend the right to have the discussion because I'm technically one of them. Hopefully my deeply-rooted position on this matter is cleared up, to some degree.
Counseling (for Eerie)
(I thought being asexual was an abuse result and I would "recover" back to "normal" at one point. Now am I seeing that it is a part of myself that probably isn't going to change, so I need to learn to accept it.)
I also have suffered from hating said orientation and fearing the "heteroromantic" part of "heteroromantic asexual", and I have recently been advised to seek counseling for that. I've never been comfortable with it, and this discussion has really showed that. So yes, I probably do need counseling. Wow. @Eerie_Coppernight I always feared it would lead to unwanted birthing and I thought I was taking advantage of guys who were looking for marriage partners which led to self-hatred. But after years of living it, I recognize that it is incredibly passive and doesn't really do anything to the guys or me. Nobody notices my romantic attractions except for me - it's never as big of a deal as I feel it is.
Still, the self-hatred/anxiety explains why I didn't immediately own it at the beginning and go from there. I tend to think that guys hate it for wasting their time, too. Wise friend, you are.
Response to Pig
I think I will have to trust your assessment on this. I might previously have been inclined to believe that a heteroromantic homosexual could have married me in theory, but I probably underestimate the power of sexual attraction. It's an easy ace mistake to just forget sexual attraction exists and to discount it entirely.
How I understand is that your parent of the same gender teaches you how to be the gender you are, while the one of the opposite gender tells you how you are to relate to the opposite gender. In my life, this theory has proven to be quite true indeed. I also watched a YouTube video by a girl who grew up with two moms and she said that she didn't know how to relate to the opposite gender as a result of her upbringing and found them scary as a result.
Perhaps that is confirmation bias, though. I also read an article about two moms who adopted a son, and they were careful to get male counsel for themselves and men in his life to deal with certain topics. So the problem can be mitigated, but that doesn't mean it isn't a problem. It would be easier if they had just done things God's way in the first place.
I thought so too. The truth is the truth, though. If people can be married without attraction, attraction is not necessary for marriage. That's why arranged marriages worked for thousands of years too.
But I understand that it is better with it, and people fought to have it, including the LGTBQ folks - they want to have who they are attracted to.
Yes. Though I think the female version is more like warmth and affection. Temperature goes up.
Can't relate to the other thing.